I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
