I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
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