OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
