No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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