Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
she told me i tasted like america
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize