just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize