hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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