He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
