Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
