Christians are straight up FREAKS
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
