yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
