I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
