holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
