Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
