I think my vagina is haunted
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
