We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize