i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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