I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i think my tv is drunk
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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