Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
that is very illegal...i love you.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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