direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
