She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
