Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
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