my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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