Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
We left an ass print on the piano.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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