College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
