Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I want to stick my p in your. b.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Randomize