Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
