if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Randomize
