You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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