My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize