How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Randomize
