I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i used baking grease as lip gloss
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
