Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
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