Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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