I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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