She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
