The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize