hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
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