There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
