I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
He did a backflip because drugs
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
