I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
