They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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