Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
