ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
40s are totally the cure
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
