Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
