She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
You may now shotgun with the bride
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
