she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
i came on her dog
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
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