Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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