My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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