pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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